Reasons
by agaveyucca
Summary: "One day, I'll finally know what its like to feel the sand sink beneath my feet, the big blue ocean's tides tugging at my toes." this started out just being really gay then it got sad and so did i. it takes place in the boom!universe and its knuxadow. cover by me!
He doesn't know how this happened. He does, but he's not sure how he let it happen.

He's looming over him, hands restraining the other's wrists against the ground. Shadow remembers grinning, thinking he had the upper hand. The echidna's breathing had slowed, and Shadow could see a faint blush formed on his muzzle, as his eyes had gone wide and vacant. If the two hadn't been fighting just moments ago, Shadow would think this would've been the perfect opportunity to lean in for a kiss. He'd pressed the red one's wrists against the ground he'd pinned him on, tightening his grip on them. He felt warm. It was odd.

Then the ground beneath them opened up, swallowing them both whole, startling the two harshly into reality, and Shadow could see the other's lavender eyes light up with fear for a split second before they both delved into the darkness beneath them. Worry stricken voices echoed above them.

"Knuckles! Are you okay?" an energetic, yet harsh voice rang from above.

He hears rubble being shoved around, and a disgruntled groan from the other. "I'm fine!"

Another voice, smaller than the one before it calls, "Just hold on, I'll-" Concrete slabs shut above them, cutting off the young fox's voice.

"Aw, man. It looks like we're stuck here."

Shadow huffs. "Speak for yourself." After a few moments of silence, he growls, realizing how drained the previous fight had left him. He's unable to use his normal means of escape.

"What? You're not gonna teleport out or whatever?" the echidna mocks.

"I can't." he said through gritted teeth.

From what Shadow could make out in the dark, he sees a hand outstretched, offering to help him up. "We should work together then! There's gotta be some way outta here right?"

Shadow grumbles, begrudgedly accepting his hand. "Don't think this changes anything."

He could see a smile forming on Knuckles' face, despite the lack of lighting. He frowned.

* * *

"Do you know where you're going?"

Knuckles smiled. "Nope!"

Shadow growled. This will get them nowhere. They'd been walking aimlessly in the dark, no direction in mind, for what seemed like hours. _'This is ridiculous.'_

He glared at the echidna in front of him. Shadow had never had too much interaction with Knuckles, besides fighting. From his fighting style, he'd assumed Knuckles was mostly brawn. He preferred to rush into every fight, throwing uncalculated punches towards his targets. Knuckles is strong, but he doesn't think before he acts. Shadow assumes the same is true for his personality.

Very different from his own personality, he'd noted.

Before he could dwell any further on the subject, they'd entered a dimly lit and barren room. There was no door, no passageway, just four walls surrounding them. Shadow stopped, prompting Knuckles to do the same.

"This doesn't look right." he said. As if on cue, the door behind them slid shut. The walls around them began to close in, slowly but surely insuring their demise.

Shadow attempted to kick the door behind them open. He tried prying it open to no avail. They were trapped. His back hit the wall, and Knuckles was pressed against the other. Crimson eyes darted around their surroundings, panic heavy in the air. A crash resounded above Shadow's head, his peripherals catching sight of two fists pounding into the brick on either side of him. His left ear twitched involuntarily.

He looked up to see Knuckles with his eyes squeezed shut, and brows pinched together in concentration. Knuckles spoke, strained and coarse, "Are you okay?"

Shadow felt his cheeks get hot, immediately uncomfortable with the close proximity to the other. He felt the same warmth from before, and attempted to brush the feeling off. "What are you doing?"

"Saving you!"

"You can't hold this forever."

"Then go!"

Shadow's voice grew in panic and confusion, "You'll die!"

He could see Knuckles' arms begin to shake, and feel the walls stutter against him.

Knuckles opened his eyes, brow furrowing in frustration. "Like you care!"

The wall behind Shadow jutted forward an inch. "Why would you risk your life for someone who doesn't even care about you?" he barked.

"I don't know!"

"There has to be _some_ reason!" Shadow all but yelled. He shook his head furiously, and dashed underneath the other's arm. He spotted a loose brick in the lower part of the wall to his left, and kicked it loose, jamming it between the moving walls. "This should buy us time."

Knuckles un-jammed his fists from the opposing wall, and grabbed Shadow's wrist, leading the other to the wall at the end of the room. He delivered a hard blow to the bricks, revealing a large, empty corridor. He yanked Shadow along with him, hearing the walls behind them crush the brick and collide together.

The two collapse to the ground, panting. Knuckles looks up at the hedgehog, bewildered. Shadow notices his glance, and glares in return. "You were going to _die_."

"I thought you didn't-"

"Even if I didn't like you, I wouldn't want to be partly responsible for your death. That is not my burden to bear." He said, eyes downcast.

Knuckles huffed, and crossed his arms. Shadow looked up to see his lips pinched together and his cheeks puffed out. He was _pouting_. "Is that really the reason?"

Shadow averted his eyes again. "I don't know."

Though Knuckles wasn't satisfied with that answer, he didn't have the time to pry, as the ground began to quake, and the ceiling began to fall. The two jumped to their feet, panic rising again.

A piece of the ceiling collapsed onto Shadow, the left side of his body being trapped underneath it. He felt electricity course through his body, limbs becoming unresponsive and limp. His vision was fuzzy, ugly iridescent lines striking through the images before him in flashes. Knuckles lifts the rubble off of him, helping the other to his feet. "Are you alright?" his voice raised in concern.

Shadow looked up to him, dazed. "Yes, I-I-I'm-" his voice catches on itself, like a broken record. His senses overloaded. Sparks fly off his wrist, catching the echidna's attention. Knuckles reached for his hand. Shadow recoiled to his touch, shooting him a glare. "I'm fine it's just-t-t" he stutters again, "It's nothing, don't-t-" Knuckles grabs his hand, cutting him off. His violet eyes widen in surprise.

"Robot stuff! Tails knows robot stuff! We need to get you to Tails!" he reaches the others stare, catching the confusion on his face. The ground shudders beneath them.

"Forget-t-t me! Why do you even-n-n care?"

"Because I like you!" Knuckles shoots back.

This takes Shadow aback, his eyes widened in confusion. "Why?" he shouted.

"I don't know! Do I need a reason?"

Before Shadow could answer, his vision flashed into black, the red echidna fading along with it.

* * *

 _'Wake up!'_

His ear twitched, his brow furrowed. He heard giggling.

 _'Shadow! Come on, you've got to get up now!'_

He groaned, one eye slowly opening. A figure loomed above, bright expectant eyes looking back at him.

 _'Wake up sleepy-head!'_

"Who..." he stops. His eyes squint, adjusting to the light. The room was getting blindingly light.

 _'It's me, silly! Its-'_

The other's voice was drowned out by a deafening buzzing, the light soon engulfing their figure. His ears began to ring, and what sounded like a light-bulb exploding brought him back into reality.

* * *

His eyes shot open, and he bolted upright. "Oh, don't move you're gonna-"

Shadow felt a jolt of electricity wrack his body, falling backwards. A large hand caught him, and he looks up to be greeted by vibrant purple eyes, holding a worried stare in them. A patient smile formed on the other's lips, and Shadow felt that familiar warmth creep up on him again.

He heard a tired sigh. "You busted another bolt. Stay there and _don't_ move! I'm gonna get my tools again." His eyes switched over to his side to see a young fox kit glaring at him before huffing and turning to the door behind him.

Another shock rattled through him, and two hands came to steady his body, placed firmly on either shoulder.

An awkward silence filled the air soon-after. Knuckles' hands still lay on Shadow, holding him in place. Shadow began to squirm under his touch, and tried wriggling out of his grip. "Oh! Sorry!" He removed his hands, leaving them limp at his sides.

The two exchanged silent and quick glances. Knuckles raises his right arm to rub the back of his neck. Shyly looking towards the other, he spoke softly, "Do you feel okay?"

Shadow's face twisted into an expression Knuckles couldn't really identify. "Do I _look_ okay?"

Knuckles sheepishly glanced away, muttering an apology.

Shadow sighed. "I'm sorry." he said quietly. "I don't mean to be harsh. I'm just...I'm just tired. I'm worn out." he admitted.

Knuckles gave him a small worried smile. "It's okay. You're safe now!"

Shadow pinched his brows together and glanced away. A heavy silence fills the room. Shadow's throat felt tight, as if the silence was hellbent on choking him. He breathed in through his nose, steadying himself. "I..."

The other looked down at him, prompting him to continue.

He purses his lips, and speaks again. "I...I don't understand."

Knuckles brow cocked in confusion. "What?"

"This. Why you're doing this. I don't understand." he meets the others gaze.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't deserve this. I don't...I didn't do anything to deserve..." he pauses, averting his eyes once more, training them on his right hand. "To deserve...Acts of kindness."

Knuckles stayed silent.

"I just don't understand." Shadow finished.

The echidna gave a bright smile. "You don't have to!" This only proved to further confuse the ebony hedgehog. "I just...I dunno. I like you!"

"Why?"

"I don't know! I just do."

Shadow didn't know how to respond to that. To being liked. He let the conversation drop there.

More silence. Deafening silence. Knuckles shifted uncomfortably and spoke softly, shyly, "So..Um...What're you gonna do...When uh, Tails gives you the okay?"

This caught Shadow off-guard. "Why do you ask?"

Knuckles paused. "I uh...I...I kinda like havin' you around."

Shadow blinked. "I suppose...I suppose I really don't know."

The other lit up, gesturing excitedly. "You should stay with us!"

He stared, stunned. He didn't think the other could be serious. Shadow was supposed to be the enemy. How pathetic would it be for him to befriend his foes? He glanced back up at Knuckles, seeing bright, expectant eyes looking right back at him.

 _'I can't believe I let myself get into this mess.'_ he thought. "Wouldn't the others be upset?"

"Pft, nah, they'll warm up to ya."

"..I...I suppose." Shadow didn't think Knuckles could smile any brighter, yet he proved him wrong once again. "But, I'd like...I'd like to stick by you, if at all possible." He registered surprise on the other's face. "I just...I don't really think the others are...Tolerant of me." he glanced away again.

"O-of course you can stay with me! I just uh, don't really have a house." he chuckled nervously. "I've uh, never really liked being in one place! I got a hammock though! And some trees. And its like right next to the beach!"

Shadow snorts, giving a small smile. He sees Knuckles blush and look away. "That sounds fine. I'm sure it's lovely." he says reassuringly. This earns another smile from the echidna.

* * *

His vision is blurred. He blinks, seeing the scene laid out before him. He doesn't know where he is, or who he's with, but he talks with her as if he's known her for years. His responses become automatic.

They over look stars, oceans of stars. Each brighter than the last. A planet is suspended below them, blue glowing hue engulfing it. It was breathtaking.

 _"Isn't it wonderful Shadow?"_ Her voice is soft, and distant.

He hums in agreement.

 _"One day, we'll be down there!"_ She points to the planet in the distance. _"One day, I'll finally know what its like to feel the sand sink beneath my feet, the big blue ocean's tides tugging at my toes. I've read about it! It sounded nice."_

Shadow nodded, eyes vacant and thoughts drifting.

 _"I want you to come with me too, Shadow!"_

He paused. "Why?"

 _She giggled. "You're my friend, silly!"_

"...Why me?"

 _"Because I like you!"_

"...Why..?"

 _"Do I need a reason?"_

Her voice faded into loud ringing, light around him brightening blindingly. It ended in a flash.

* * *

His eyes shot open. He bolted upright, a strong hand firmly holding him in place. He looked to his side, greeted by large purple puppy-dog eyes, widened in concern.

"Are you okay?"

He sighed, pinching his brows together. "Yes...Yes I'm fine."

"You sure?"

He met the others eyes, smiling gently. "I'm alright. Thank you."

He heard footsteps, assumed to be Tails'. It's been at least a few days, though it was hard for Shadow to keep track, since he'd been admitted into Tails' "Robot Hospital", as Knuckles called it. Both had been keeping a close eye on the hedgehog-preventing him from "busting bolts" and keeping him well rested. He hadn't seen much of the others, assuming they'd decided to keep their distance. With reason, of course. He didn't expect to gain their trust that easily.

Tails seemed to at least tolerate him. Maybe finding out about Shadow's "condition" helped ease the fox up, since he'd lived a life buried in electronics and technology. Maybe Knuckles' trust helped Tails find comfort in their new... _friend_? Either way, Shadow was grateful, silently so.

"Alright Shadow, I think you're good to go. Try standing." the fox kit stood beside Knuckles, tools nearby and at the ready.

Shadow slowly maneuvered himself off the table, placing his feet to the floor. Knuckles had his hand resting on Shadow's left shoulder, ready to steady the other if necessary. He breathed in, and pushed himself off his resting place. Immediately his knee shocked and buckled. Knuckles quickly caught him, arms tightly wrapped around the other's chest, holding him from behind. Shadow's muzzle tinted red.

"Okay, okay, hold on. Keep him steady! It's probably a loose screw or something." Tails lifted the medical tape that covered the exposed joint. He didn't have anything near as sophisticated as the synthetic skin covering the rest of Shadow's body, so they had to make due for the time being.

Shadow's muzzle reddened more, embarrassed to the core, as he felt Knuckles' grip tighten around him, and as he felt more and more like an old broken car being brought into an auto-shop for repairs.

It was going to be a while before he was agile again.

"There! That should do it!" the fox re-applied the medical tape, and stood up. He raised a brow. "Uh...Knuckles? You can let go now."

The echidna blushed, releasing his hold on Shadow. "Oh! Right. Okay! Uh...Sorry." he laughed nervously, rubbing the back of his neck.

Tails rolled his eyes and walked back to the shelves, picking off parts for something. Shadow looked to Knuckles and smiled. "Would you care to show me around?"

The other grinned widely, eyes shining as bright as the sun. "Of course!"

* * *

Knuckles had led him to a small clearing near the ocean. Two lone trees stood opposite of one another, holding a hammock in between.

"And here is my humble abode! Its uh, really humble."

Shadow grinned. "I like it."

"T-Thank you! I do my best!" he replied, confidently.

The two sat on the hammock in silence, the sound of the ocean waves rolling against the sand and back filling the air. The trees danced in the wind, gently rocking their current resting place. It was peaceful. Serene. Shadow had never seen anything like it before, except in his dreams.

 _'Or nightmares.'_ He couldn't decide which.

They all ended the same. They were always nonsense to him. It seemed as if he was reliving a past life, or the memories of another. Nothing he dreamed ever held any memorial value to him, and he could never recognize the girl. She was in all of them. He didn't understand why he dreamed either, being a synthetic being. None of it really made sense. He'd only really started to question it now.

They all left him with a feeling of emptiness. Of loss. Loneliness. He couldn't really understand why.

He felt Knuckles shift, snapping him back to reality and out of his thoughts. He looked toward the other, who was surprisingly looking right back at him.

"Uh...u-um..." he looked away, vibrant violet eyes filled with an emotion Shadow couldn't quite put his finger on.

"Is something the matter?" Shadow cocked his head, ear twitching to the side.

Knuckles shook his head. "N-No! I just...Uh..." he paused, looking nervously back at Shadow. "Um...Can...Can I see your hand?"

Shadow raised a brow, but complied. He reached out his ungloved hand, giving the other a patient but confused stare. Knuckles gently took it, holding it in both of his own. He ran a thumb over where Shadow's synthetic skin had been scraped off, now covered in medical tape. Shadow didn't pull away, finding the touch oddly comforting.

"Does it hurt?" he asked, his brows upturned in worry, eyes now trained on the hedgehog.

He shook his head. "Not anymore. It did at first, since the skin had nerves on it. But with it gone I can't feel anything there anymore. Its just metal."

The other hummed in response, concern not fully draining from his features. He looked back down at Shadow's hand. He continued running his thumb around the wound in a circular motion.

"Sorry, Shadow." he said quietly, barely above a whisper.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. This isn't your fault."

"But I still feel bad. You got hurt!" he was now holding Shadow's hand in his own, lacing his fingers through the others, still running his thumb across his skin.

That incriminating warmth spread throughout Shadow's body again, and he could feel it rise to his muzzle. He didn't mind as much though. He felt at ease.

"I'm fine now." he assured.

"...You promise?" his eyes trained back on Shadow's.

"Yes." he smiled.

The silence was no longer awkward. It was nice. Comfortable.

"Hey! Knuckles!" the pair jumped upon hearing the badger's voice cut through the quiet.

Knuckles unraveled his hand from Shadow's to wave at Sticks. "What's up?"

Shadow looked back at the badger, slightly miffed at her for interrupting.

"Would you and Mr. Mysterious wanna come down to the beach with us? The spot we're goin' to is a lot less boring." she gestured further down the coast, where the wind seemed to affect the current a lot more. Larger waves rolled onto the sand, pulling at the ground before it.

"Sure!" he turned to Shadow, "You wanna come with?"

Shadow hesitantly nodded.

"Cool! Just don't try any funny business buddy. I got my eye on you!" she motioned at Shadow, then swiftly turned around, walking back the direction she came.

As Knuckles got up to follow, Shadow hesitated. "Are you sure its a good idea for me to come along?"

He smiled. "It'll be fine! I promise!"

* * *

 _"Isn't it wonderful Shadow?"_

He breathed in through his nose, and out again through his mouth. One step at a time, he carried himself to the waves.

 _"One day, we'll be down there!"_

His stride was slow, as if going any faster would disturb the ocean in all its tranquility.

 _"One day, I'll finally know what its like to feel the sand sink beneath my feet, the big blue ocean's tides tugging at my toes. I've read about it! It sounded nice."_

The words rang through his ears, gently and repetitively, as he approached the ocean. His eyes scanned the coast-line cautiously. The others had gone off to swim, Knuckles along with them.

 _"I want you to come with me too, Shadow!"_

He slowly walked towards the rolling tide, feet reaching the damp sand.

 _"You're my friend, silly!"_

He could feel the sand sink under his weight, softly pulling him down.

 _"Because I like you!"_

The tide reached him, cool water rushing past his feet, pausing briefly before pulling back, tugging the land with it and beckoning him further. The ground around his feet decayed, drifting into the ocean now, allowing his feet to sink more and more into the sand.

 _"Do I need a reason?"_

He inhaled sharply, as a wave of emotions crashed into him, along with the cool salt water. He felt something prick at his eyes. He didn't know why. Tears started rolling down his muzzle, to his lips. As quick as it came, the wave had left, the tears along with it, as he dragged his arm across his face.

"Shadow?" a gentle voice came from behind him. He blinked, too startled, too disoriented to react.

She walked closer, until she came to his right side. They stood together silently until she spoke up again. "It's beautiful, isn't it?" He nodded absentmindedly, prompting her to continue. "The waves have an endless repetitive pattern. Its soothing. Anytime I'm stressed I like to watch the tide roll in and back out again."

He didn't respond. He didn't know how. He didn't understand why she decided to talk to him in the first place. She seemed dead-set on getting him to talk, and continued attempting conversation.

"I know it must be difficult. Interacting with people who you used to antagonize any chance you got." He shifted uncomfortably. "But...I know that there has to be some reason you decided to stay with us. So there's something in you willing to try."

He chuckled, catching her attention. "I used to think the same thing. But I honestly don't know anymore."

She raised a brow. "What do you mean?"

"I don't know the reason. I don't know why I'm doing this. I just am."

She scoffed. "Oh come on, there has to be some reason, right?"

He shook his head. "If there is, I don't know it."

"Then why are you here?"

He paused. He saw Knuckles off in the distance, excitedly talking to Tails about something, his vibrant purple eyes widening along with his smile, and he felt that same warmth again. He finally understood what it meant, and smiled.

"Do I need a reason?"


End file.
